this might even be a better way of looking at it,
why is it when looking at other's work (because you don't experience their view of their work...)
you don't see the struggle, so you basically think it's perfect... in the meantime, they just weren't thinking of it.
i guess i'm super transfixed on negative shit. i'm afraid of everything being imperfect.
and i dunno.
it just feels so weird.
everything basically looks as tho its gonna fall apart at any minute . so i get scared. but seriously i feel like such a broke ass loser. then i wonder where do people get THAT feeling? why do i feel like i need things? i realize saying I to refer to myself is a pattern too i am not exactly i but thats the best way to describe it. i don't even know why its so important to say that and i get so confused about how everyone doesn't have the same lives. i'm just dumbfounded by things people have supposedly done. and compare it to my feelings and i'm like what is going on?! so i'm going to post this on my blog. and i'm going to start posting here more regularly. i think i've put people through a lot and even though i talk about myself, i can't express anything about what anyone else thinks
or goes through and i wonder why getting messages like these are scary too that's how i react when people are messaging me like this
where does it all come from? why is it so painful? like why is boredom so shitty haha?
why the fuck is boredom so shitty?